Colossians 3:10-17
10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. 11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.
12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Matthew 18:15-18
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Amen.
When his mother bought the house next door he sold as quick as he could, moved into same town but near Blacklick creek that flooded basement frequently, one car garage, he had to rent another space to continue his home business. All this because he did not want to live next to his mother.) I don’t know what she did. I did not ask, I did not want to know. Is forgiveness always warranted? What is forgiveness?
The past few weeks we have been dealing with this middle part of Colossians 3. It states that we are to put to death what is earthly in us and then proceeds to give a couple of short lists which are in the negative. As believers, we are to put OFF these things.
We approach the text where Paul turns his attention into the affirmative. He makes a list of affirming things, positive things that we are to put on.
Beginning with 3:10 we put on this new self that is in the EIKON of the Creator (Jesus). We do this because we have been renewed. Our OLD self has died.
What are we to put on? (3:12) He begins to make an affirmative list: compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness and patience. We do this because we are chosen in God, we bear with one another and forgive each other.
This text happens to come at a very interesting moment. We had a high-profile memorial service where the wife, now widow, of a murdered man, in a very public way proclaimed forgiveness for the killer of her husband.
At Charlie Kirks memorial service you had two extremes. You had the wife who not only forgave the killer, but she also quoted the words of Jesus, as he was on the cross just before he died. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
Then you had Stephen Miller who said to the killer, “You are nothing, you have nothing, and we are coming for you.”
I found both of those very interesting statements. That is loaded. You have people who are Christian and non-Christian who say the Christian community has to chose one of those. It can’t be both.
It doesn’t. Before I am done today you will see why that both of those statements are valid Christian responses to the reaction to what has happened.
For many Christians in America have been instructed in forgiveness sometimes in very dangerous ways. It is fortunate for us that this public display happened just as our study came to the topic of forgiveness in our text.
What does the Bible have to say about forgiveness? We have read our text and added the text of Matthew 18. We have the words of Ms. Kirk as she quoted Jesus’ words on the Cross.
We prayed the Lords Prayer together which mentions it and then after we also have the words of Jesus just as he concluded the Lord’s prayer, “If you forgive those who trespass against you then your father will forgive your trespasses. But if You do not forgive those who trespass against you, then your heavenly father will not forgive your trespasses.”
Jesus also taught, love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you. How are we to understand forgiveness in light of Jesus? How does it apply in our text here in Colossians 3?
I will say that this will take a couple of weeks to fully unpack so please stick with me. We are not going to break down every passage and parable on forgiveness, but we are going to give a thorough look at the topic.
The issue is, when we get this wrong it can be very dangerous. The church, in general terms, has gotten this wrong more than it has gotten it right.
There have been some cases, in public life and in the church, leaders have gotten this wrong and it has proved deadly, hurtful and dangerous. It has caused some people to leave church doors to never return.
Too often we look at forgiveness with a monolithic application. Often is the case, the nuances is ignored and the whole counsel of God is bypassed.
Let’s start on the ground floor as we begin a comprehensive look at forgiveness.
POINT: So often is the case in this situation is forgiveness is more for the person doing the forgiving than the person receiving it.
Are there passages that hint towards forgiveness not being automatic? Yes. Consider the following:
- Matthew 18:15ff: Look at our second text. (Matthew 18:15) “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you two alone. If he listens, you have gained your brother. If he does not listen, take two others. If he refuses to listen to them, then tell it to the church. If he does not listen to all that, treat him as a Gentile and a tax collector.”
This is the process of reconciliation between two people. Jesus did not say:
- If a brother (sister) sins against you, tell everyone about it. Go to everyone else and talk about how awful that person is and how in the world could they do such and such.
- If a brother (sister) sins against you, just forgive and forget. Just overlook it and move on because I forgave you and you should forgive them.
He says, go to them and address it. That does not fix it? Bring a couple of people. That does not fix it? Bring it to the church. That does not fix it? They are cast out.
This is a situation where they are not forgiven. Something is being held against them, and it is whatever that offense is. Avoid, refuse to be with them.
- Adultery and Marriage: Another passage to consider is when adultery has been committed in a marriage or in the case of abandonment. Jesus mentions adultery and Paul mentions abandonment (1 Corinthians 7).
These are cases where the offended party can leave the marriage. If we are to monolithically apply forgive because we have been forgiven, then it would render Jesus’ teaching on divorce void.
- A Believer who is in serious sin : I can provide one more example and it is with Paul in the Corinthian church. There was a man who was sexually immoral (1 Corinthians 5). This was going on and the church, up until Paul’s letter, was tolerating it. He explicitly says, remove this man from you. A little leaven leavens the whole bread. A little sin will fester within that body and grow.
He tells them, this man needs to go. Do not associate with people who say they are brothers and sisters in Christ and are in unrepentant habitual sin. Paul says, do not even eat with such a person.
So, I hope you can better see that forgiveness is not just something Christians automatically dispense. We are not instructed that 100% of the time we are to go from sin to automatic forgiveness. The Christian community has most often been taught if they are sinned against it is universal and unilaterally automatic forgive.
Here is the danger: there have been many cases where something happens in a congregation (sadly this happens more than you know). The elders and leaders of that congregation are made aware of it and then they decide to handle this in house because we are supposed to be forgiving.
IN HOUSE LEADERSHIP: There have been MANY cases of abuse, sexual and physical, where the offended party has been coerced to forgive the offender because the offender said, “I repent” and Jesus says that we should forgive as we have been forgiven.
This has been the source of A LOT of people who eventually leave the church angry, frustrated never to return. They are hurt and betrayed.
Church, we need to understand this. We have to get this right. So how do we get this right?
What has been presented here are some situations that contradict the teaching that Christians are to blanket offer forgiveness to every situation regardless of the offender has done. So how do we justify that which is contradicting? How can we make these teachings line up?
Categories & Definitions
On the ADMINISTERING of Justice, Scripture provides three categories :
- Personal
- Magistrate
- Pastoral
Personal
Erika Kirk stated in her speech at the Charlie Kirk funeral that she forgave the killer. She quoted Christ, “Forgive them they do not know what they are doing.”
Did you know that most people who offend you, who sin against you, even when it is heinous sin, do not know fully what they are doing? Do you think the killer thought about two baby girls growing up without their father? I really doubt it.
From the slightest sin committed against you to the worst sin that can be committed against you, it is safe to say the offending party did not know the complete impact of their sin.
This position of Erika Kirk, if it is meant from the heart, is the best position to be in. Why? It is a release. It is the beginning of release. Forgiveness is a process of growth.
I would argue it is like our opening illustration; it is a release of a burden. It is making a statement that you will not allow this thing that was done to you to control every part of your future.
Public
There is a public responsibility for these things. The government holds the sword.
For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. . . 4 for he is God’s servant for your good. . . . for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer. Romans 13:1-2 & 4
The public servant, the government, is the servant (deacon) of God. The government is to carry the sword and act out justice for those who are wronged.
There have been many congregations whose leadership whose actions said, “We are going to force the member of our body to forgive a crime, and we are not going to let the government do its God designed job.”
We also have judges who are not doing their jobs. We have prosecutors who are not acting justly. What happens in these instances?
You cannot treat public enemies from a private method. This is why I said, Erika’s response to the murderer is correct and Stephen Miller’s response to the murderer was correct. It is not an either or. It is both.
You have a young girl murdered on a Charlotte, NC subway train by a criminal who had been arrested and released 14 times. This is the result of treating public enemies from the private method.
Pastoral
The church brings the water, word, wine and the wheat (bread). The church has a responsibility here as well. They are to preach the gospel. These are the tools of the church.
When a congregation of a church has a matter which arises which is in the jurisdiction of the magistrate, the leadership is to allow the civil authority to address the matter. They are not to simply sweep it under the rug.
The church is to pray for repentance of the offender. The offender is to be addressed by the civil authority and the church is to pray for their salvation.
Closing
The issue for so many is, if they offer forgiveness when there is a sense that you are justifying what has happened against you. This is not the case.
You are expressing a faith that God will handle this justly. You are releasing your notion of getting even and allowing the proper authorities to enact justice.
Think of the twelve apostles in the first century. Tradition tells us, history tells us that they all suffered greatly. Eleven of the twelve suffered death. John was boiled in oil and lived only to be exiled to the island of Patmos.
Do you not think these had a right to get even? How do you think the church prayed for those involved in the trial, imprisonment and execution?
I am certain that they prayed for them.